You carried the holocaust hidden in a cup,
like a wolf as it would a howl biding
Need I remind you that my buoyancy in
this primordial urge to color-correct the
manic streaks that you etched into the
that grime from your beetle eyes rapidly
expanding their whiteness into this
zygotic lull that I carry around and
masquerade as a limp (a necessary token
from our past encounters),
is as far as my indiscretions would go.
Yes. I will stitch your fish belly with orange
seams to keep the pellets out.
But, my buoyancy in this second is a toss
into our future.
Speak. Or else, you will realize that no
part of you was a piece of a labyrinth,
one that you thought you were hiding.
The secret is that the tentacles of these
seconds will be incongruent with what was
bound to happen.
You can call me happenstance.
So, what is this going to be?
This afternoon, we crammed ourselves into the lycra of one of your hypotheticals,
irreverently disentangling the climax from the cradle. The lull in your head can wait.
There were three of us. The inquisitor, the adjudicator and the one willing to wilt.
This was five years before we moored our crucifixes to the shore, mismanaging,
pretend-holding our crimson rears, like skeletons, loose ends all taut and twines
for daggers masquerading as
I remember rigging all my senses, ready to fold and unfold, into universes above
and beneath, like a fulcrum collapsing from its rectilinear dance, thinking the pitch
was to always level up.
Were you expecting someone?
Did someone moonwalk into your lonely terrarium?
Do you think of recoloring us?
What if I do?
What if, indeed?
This has to end the way it started.
First, a momentous carnival.
Second, a zygotic stillness that cannibalizes us both.
About the Author
Kalyani Bindu is an Indian writer and researcher working on areas related to the intersection of neuropsychiatry and informatics. Her works have appeared/are forthcoming in the Kali Project (Indie Blu(e)), 45th Parallel, Better than Starbucks, Half Empty Magazine, the Indian Express, Modern Literature, Ethos Literary Journal, New Asian Writing, Guftugu, Madras Courier, and elsewhere. Check out www.kalyani-bindu.com to read her works.